A chubbier woman: Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?
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Mirror: “Kindly move aside. I can’t see anything.”
Doctor: And how is it going with your old ailment, Mr Smith?
Patient: Very well, I’ve been divorced for half a year now.
A lady tells the nurse at a maternity hospital, “I want to call my little baby Ellie.”
Nurse replies, “I’m sorry, but that name is already taken, perhaps you can consider naming her Ellie532 or Ellie_153?”My girlfriend admitted to me she was once a Christian, so I immediately broke up with her.
It may come across as judgmental, but really, I’ve only ever known and loved her as Christine.
Daddy, there is a man at the door. He says he is collecting for the nursing home.
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That's perfect. Tell him grandpa is coming in a moment.