Daily Smile thread

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Ya don't need a wrench to tighten my nuts
when looking at that.

 

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For those of you who remember watching 'Stars in Their Eyes' in the 90s, a singing competition-style TV show in which vocal soundalikes of major recording artists were made to look like the singers they impersonated:

On the set of TV show 'Stars in Their Eyes', presenter Matthew Kelly introduces the next candidate as Simon. In walks a young man, covered in a huge plaster cast from his neck down to his toes. Matthew Kelly asks him what happened to him and he explains that he survived a dreadful road accident, in which his passenger, his uncle, was sadly killed. Simon goes on to explain that he lost both his legs in the accident but the surgeons were able to transplant his uncle's legs onto his body successfully. The audience gives Simon a huge round of applause and Matthew Kelly then asks him the usual 'Stars in Their Eyes' question:
-'So, tell us who you are going to be...'
-'Well, tonight, Matthew, I'm going to be...'
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.
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'... Simon and Half-Uncle'.

 

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If Carlsberg did Roadworks

 

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Introducing the new Katie Price Olympic sized shame cave , fun for all the family........

 

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Trying to get adopted first

 

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