Thought for the day?

[Allan1]

If you were to shoot a mime artist, should you use a silencer?

Buzz

 

[derek kelly]

Why waste ammo? just batter the twat

 

[gypsy]

another thought ?

why are the bastards allways in when you ring a wrong number ? :dunno:

 

[derek kelly]

But all that effort making up the batter. Why not just hit him/her?

Coming from yorkshire we already have the batter made up for yorkshire puds, so it's no effort really

 

[cannonball]

Couple More

How does the snow plough driver get to work..
If a tree falls in the woods and theirs no-one to hear it does it make a noise..
When they administer a lethal injection on death row, why do they swab the arm.. :dunno: :dunno:

Look forward to some more, over to you.

:beer:

Bob

 

[ianrobbo1]

how about the "best before" date on bottled "natural spring water"?? :dunno:
why is a door "ajar" when it is clearly an "open" door,!!
why say "nice to see you" when both they and you hate the sight of each other,??
or "call again" and you dont want them too ??? :dunno:

 

[SILVERONE]

You can be sat there waiting for ages for everone to saddle-up, gloves & helmet on, but as soon as they are all ready to go your head starts inching :dunno: :bang:
"HOW'S THAT THEN" c7u8

 

[derek kelly]

Why do farts rattle when you are sat on a wooden bench?

 

[SILVERONE]

Speaking of Farts

man8um Flammable & inflammable what's the difference then :dunno: :dunno: :dunno:

 

[Artemis]

If a tree falls in the woods and theirs no-one to hear it does it make a noise..
:dunno: :dunno:

Look forward to some more, over to you.

:beer:

Bob

or....

If a man is talking in the woods with no-one there to hear him......

Is he still wrong?
















of course he is,















he's a man!!!!!


Leathers, 125 keys, in hiding, can't ride fast enough..... (yet!) MOVE OVER BERT

 

[Punchy]

how about the "best before" date on bottled "natural spring water"?? :dunno:
why is a door "ajar" when it is clearly an "open" door,!!
why say "nice to see you" when both they and you hate the sight of each other,??
or "call again" and you dont want them too ??? :dunno:

Like that one Ian
Its taken 1000 years to filter through volcanic rock.... but if you don't drink it by a week on Wednesday it'll be after the best before date.

:bang:

 

[Punchy]

Brake Pads

A mate of mine has just bought a new set of brake pads for his bike.
Reading the important fitting instuctions on the back.....

It says..........
"Fit pads with friction material facing the disc"

Anyone tried them the other way?

 

[derek kelly]

Bought some peanuts from morrisons, what does it say on the label??
caution may contain nuts...well I hope so

 

[SILVERONE]

Is Muffin the Mule illegal ?

 

[Quiney]

Is Muffin the Mule illegal ?

No!

It's much the same as a Goblin Teas-made

 

[SILVERONE]

Who invented milk ? and what was he up to when he descovered it ?

 

[derek kelly]

And who discovered that Piss alleviates jellyfish stings???

 

[SILVERONE]

What came 1st, the hen or the egg ? :dunno:

 

[derek kelly]

What came 1st, the hen or the egg ? :dunno:

Dunno never saw the egg shagging the hen

 

[FreeBird]

More

Why does the gynaecologist leave the room when the Patient gets undressed?

Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic'?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?

Is French kissing in France just called kissing?

What do you call male ballerinas?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

and so on and so on :bang: :neenaw: