LOL

[Fat Bert]

A man staggers into the casualty department with concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.

Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened.

"Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, Rebecca, when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls into a field of cows. We went to look for them, and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it, stuck right in the middle of the cow's arse.

That's when I made my big mistake."

"What did you do?" asks the doctor.

"Well, I lifted the cow's tail and yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!'.

I don't remember much after that."

 

[Fat Bert]

LOL part two

For those who have wives/partners who have got carried away with eating over Xmas, you may like suggest the following dieting plan....

Recommend that she take a 3 mile brisk walk each morning,

Then in the evening take another 3 mile brisk walk each evening,

Then plan is that by the end of the week she will be at least 42 miles away.

 

[Chunky Monkey]

feck me Bert...Shaun only just e-mailed that to ya..... :f

 

[ianrobbo1]

Mark you should see how quickly he "nicks" pictures as his own!!!