Why it’s good to have a dog

[derek kelly]

I am sitting here & every so often letting out silent but very smelly farts, Bev is sat holding her nose & twice now she has kicked (not literally) the dog into the garden, if I’m going to break wind whilst the dog is outside I go into the kitchen on the pretext of checking on tea.

 

[andyBeaker]

I am sitting here & every so often letting out silent but very smelly farts, Bev is sat holding her nose & twice now she has kicked (not literally) the dog into the garden, if I’m going to break wind whilst the dog is outside I go into the kitchen on the pretext of checking on tea.

Cats fulfill this very useful function as well.

Allegedly.....

 

[derek kelly]

Cats fulfill this very useful function as well.

Allegedly.....

Cat farts smell of fish.

 

[Me!]

Why do you check on ‘tea’ ? Surely it is dinner?

 

[Cougar377]

Why do dogs always look around in surprise when they fart .?
Cats don't even raise an eye lid.

One of our Newfs used to get up and leave the room when he let one go. Mind you, what came out was in contravention of the Geneva Convention ..

 

[derek kelly]

Why do you check on ‘tea’ ? Surely it is dinner?

Dinner is mid day meal, don’t argue with me I’m a qualified chef.

 

[sr71caspar]

Dinner is mid day meal, don’t argue with me I’m a qualified chef.

When is lunch then?

 

[Cougar377]

I thought Tea was just a drink until I moved to the south coast.

 

[Oldandbald]

Tea isn't even a drink.

 

[ianrobbo1]

 

[Cougar377]

Tea isn't even a drink.

Now if I was trying to root out Martian invaders trying to pass themselves off as human then you've just failed the test.

 

[Pow-Lo]

I agree with Dezza. Breakfast, dinner and tea.

Dogs are awesome for blaming farts on. Thing is, when we had our little dog, I had to leave the room when she dropped a banger. Dirty little cow.

 

[Me!]

I agree with Dezza. Breakfast, dinner and tea.

Dogs are awesome for blaming farts on. Thing is, when we had our little dog, I had to leave the room when she dropped a banger. Dirty little cow.

How uncouth / typical...

 

[derek kelly]

When is lunch then?

Lunch is a name given to Dinner by snobs who want to disassociate themselves from the working classes.

 

[andyBeaker]

Lunch is a name given to Dinner by snobs who want to disassociate themselves from the working classes.

Breakfast, lunch, dinner.

Simples.

 

[derek kelly]

Breakfast, lunch, dinner.

Simples.

Breakfast
Snack
Dinner
Afternoon snack
Tea
Supper

 

[ianrobbo1]

Breakfast
Snack
Dinner
Afternoon snack
Tea
Supper

= Fat git

 

[Me!]

Breakfast
Snack
Dinner
Afternoon snack
Tea
Supper

Doctors or A&E

 

[Cougar377]

Scoff, scoff and scoff.. . Or scran, scran and scran (for you salty bastids).

Seemples.

 

[Jaws]

Why do dogs always look around in surprise when they fart .?

Dillon makes me crack up sometimes..
He LOVES eating grass.. Sometimes, if he has swallowed a long piece whole, it passes straight through him.
When it is time for 'doings', the grass piece will come out as it went in.. Only problem is, he can feel it and thinks something is trying to get IN his bum... His response is to try and run away from it !!!!!!!!!!!!
So I end up running after him, poo bag on the hand, so I can pull it out !
Of course when I do that, he is off like a nutter again