• Welcome to the new B.I.R.D. Forum. Please be sure to read the "New Member / New Registered ? Please Read" thread in the Coffee Shop. This contains some important information. To become a full member ( £5.90 a year ) simply click on your user name near the top on the right I hope you enjoy the new site ................ Jaws ( John )

Pleased to announce~~

  • Thread starter fat bert
  • Start date
F

fat bert

Guest
that after intensive chatroon negotiations.
.
.
.
.
.
..
Jon [as in Jon and Anya]
.
..
has democratically been voted into the official position of
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Midlands Massif Stunt Co-ordinator"
in charge of organising all Midlands Ride out's!!

Let's hear it for Jon?????

The Midlands Massif are aiming for 10 Ride outs in 2003

What are the Souther Pooftah's doing?
How about the Northern Nancies?
 
P

petrosc

Guest
Well done Jon

I trust you to do a good job. The last one you were involved went very well.

Or was it when I ended up in Abudabi?

I can't remember.............
 
F

fat bert

Guest
It was Pete~~

That infamous moment on our Mega-Welsh Ride-Out.

To explain...............
we stopped in Aberdoverry on the West Welsh coast [I think] for a fag-break.

Pete the Kebab Man phoned his wife Sandra.
.
told her we were in Abudabi .
.
.
.
"Abudabi" she questioned?
.
Well there's lots of sand here - he replied.

She's never trusted us all since!

The Midlands Massif are planning between 6-10 ride outs in 2003

C'mon you Southerners - want to join us?
 
D

D.S.

Guest
6-10 ride outs in a year?

:lol: we could do that in two months :lol: who's up for this, anyone?
 

Samster

chamon motherf*cker
10 this year? We'll have done a minimum of 10 within 2 months! We have Alton every Wednesday and Odiham on the first Wed of every month................c'mon Jon set yaselves a decent target!
 
F

fat bert

Guest
Bugger off~

ya southern pooftah's!!

A Proper Ride out aint just a jaunt round the M25 avoiding the Gatso's

To qualify as a proper Ride Out :-

a] Involve overnight stay @ BIRD members house [so that's a two day event]

b] Involve minimum 300 miles riding [10 laps of M25]

c] Consumption of copious amounts of alcohol

d] Digital proof that at least 10 members took part [ooe err] posted on the forum

Now from memory, you only did the Bulldog Bash last year and that was only Samster and Barmy Ben

Get ya act togther!! LOL
 

Samster

chamon motherf*cker
Bert - we need to get the terminology starightened out!...........

Whilst your four criteria are critically important, they describe more of a 'mini-bash' to me rather than just a ride-out...................
 
F

fat bert

Guest
Correct~~

"Midlands Massif Stunt Co-ordinator" in charge of organising all Midlands Ride out's!!

Ever thought of reading glasses Samster??? Ride outs' in this style ARE Mini-Bashes!!!
 

Wolfie

Is a lunp
ever thought of going back to school and doing some maths bert????


10 laps of M25 = 300miles????

so the M25 is only 30 miles long then is it, thought it was about 110miles long, never mind my mistake.


A ride out is a ride out, not a mini bash, ie you ride the bike, not ride, drink, sleep, ride.

Northern nancy boys have to stay out, so they can give each other a big cuddle during the night.:m :f :yo:
 
F

fat bert

Guest
M25~~??

so the M25 is only 30 miles long then is it, thought it was about 110miles long, never mind my mistake.

Only seems like it cos of all those soft-arsed Southern cage-drivers
 

PsychoBikerBen

Psychotic Artworker. RIP
Yeah

And you Midland minsers have to mark the ocasions by having a big song and dance to the rest of the world.
We , on the other hand, are out and about most weekends as well as during the evenings of the week.
I mean - with Newlands corner,Box Hill,Ace Cafe,Alton,The Lord Derby etc,etc -We don't have to plan for B&Bs for mini holidays-No mate,we live the life and storm the countryside to where bikers congrigate.None of this "softly,Softly,overnight stay @ the Minsers drive in for the terminally comfort seeking pensioners:}
You may have stayed the night @ the Midlands meet Southerns do but Ya didn't use a tent bert,Ya changed into ya nice crisp shirt and ponced it up with a hospital cornered bed.I thought nothing of riding all the way up and all the way down cos it was a nice enough day.
We left the Wolf man up with U guys for re-con purposes just incase you decided to have an O-so wild time.But that didn't happen - eh? And Mr Wolfman was quite happy to bed down in a tent.
bert - your one of the only people I know who can probably tell me if the dreaded 'Teas Maid' is still in use today:f :}
 
F

fat bert

Guest
Seem to recall that~~

the following morning Foxy couldn't manage the run out - was having difficulty standing upright!!

The Hard Billy Mitchell lookalike was heard to say "I can't manage this - you go on without me" ROFLMAO

As for sleeping arrangements - quiet appropriate the Southern Poofs sleeping in tents - about the closest you lot will get to a decent erection!!!

Only reason ya canna afford decent hotel accomodation, is you you're all the skint after paying your mortgage each month!!!

Back to ya Gatso's, traffic jams and "dual carriageways"

Wusses
 

Attachments

  • trafficlondon.jpg
    trafficlondon.jpg
    14.5 KB · Views: 80
F

fat bert

Guest
Do you know~~

the best thing about Scotland?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
it's even further away from you lot than we are.
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
.

time to move further north !!
 
D

D.S.

Guest
As you've decided to attack the home town of the Samster, I

shall leave it to him to reply, however how anyone from 'kin DERBY can have a go at any other town, village or city is beyond me. I went there once and to say it was a bit of a culture shock would be the understatment of the year :B
And leave Scotland out of this it's a beautiful country - don't go spoilin it!!!
 

Samster

chamon motherf*cker
That Basingstoke site was OK actually...........I thought it'd be a bit tongue in cheek but it was sensible...........never knew there was soooo much to do...........! Anyway I'm more Southampton that B'Stoke as I've only been where I am currently for a year..............
 

Wolfie

Is a lunp
Yes bert, I did say that i would not be able to manage the ride out.....

cause i had the FOOKIN SHITS!!!! .

and at least i did not fook off to bed at about 10pm.


The best thing about scotland they would not you in, has history, lovely views, the women talk with a sexy accent, the best roads i have been on without a doubt. forget your yorkshire and dales , wales roads. they are nothing compared to the scottish ones.

Bert you camping or B&B at the bash?????
 
Top